Every hybrid team has a Chief Nap Officer, and it was never a person. It turned up unannounced on the first video call, walked across the keyboard mid-sentence and sat down on the spacebar. It has attended every meeting since, and nobody has ever sent it an invite.
The artwork is its profile card, filled in properly. A big round avatar holds one flat cat face, drawn in clean vector shapes with thick even outlines, two pointed ears and the unbothered look cats keep for people who are working. A presence dot sits on the rim, because it is always online. CHIEF NAP OFFICER runs beside it in the weight a real title gets, and beneath the header two rows state the record without comment: SLEEPS ON THE KEYBOARD, then JOINS EVERY CALL UNINVITED. No app, no logo, nothing borrowed from anyone's workspace.
Soft and easy, made for the long stretch between the first call and the last.
It lands on the colleague whose cat has a recurring role in every standup, the partner working from the other end of the sofa, or the cat owner who has been calling it the boss for years. Most people buy the first one for themselves.
The title was self-awarded. Nobody has challenged it.
