The org chart has one entry nobody voted for, and it is asleep on the keyboard. Every remote team with a cat eventually learns the same thing: the most senior member of staff attends every call, contributes a tail across the webcam, and answers to no one.
The artwork gives it the profile card it clearly already believes it has. A wide round avatar carries one flat cat face in clean vector shapes with thick even outlines, pointed ears up and expression entirely unimpressed. A presence dot sits on the rim, because it has never once logged off. CHIEF NAP OFFICER sits beside it in full title weight, and underneath, two rows of plain fact: SLEEPS ON THE KEYBOARD, then JOINS EVERY CALL UNINVITED. No app, no logo, nothing lifted from anyone's workspace.
Built for the long-sleeve months, which is also when the warm laptop becomes the most contested seat in the house.
It goes to the coworker whose cat has appeared in every meeting since the first one, the partner who negotiates daily for their own chair, or the cat owner who already refers to it as management. Bought for yourself first, then for the one person who will not need it explained.
The appointment was not advertised.
